FOR WOMEN ONLY....

This is the funniest video-reminds me of my cat

2009-01-03T13:04:00.000-08:00

www.youtube.com/watch?v=w0ffwDYo00Q

Being Negative

2009-01-03T05:35:00.001-08:00

If you ask a negative question --- you will get a negative answer.

So be positive...it's just easier in the long run.

New Year's Resolutions

2009-01-01T16:27:00.000-08:00

2009 Resolutions

Be nice to telemarketers. I think it was on a Seinfeld episode that Jerry said to a telemarketer "Give me your home number and I will call you back when it's convenient for me to talk." I thought it was so funny that I used that line several times when I got called during dinner. But this year, I'm going to be kinder. These people are usually low paid, hard-working, just doing their job. I can imagine that the majority of people they call --- are not nice. (Side note: Be nice to all people in the service industry.)

Listen more carefully when my husband is talking. Be fully present.

Be healthier--- stop over indulging in food and drink.

Have more fun.

Wear a bikini. (Just kidding---this is ridiculous!)

The High Cost of Living

2008-12-21T13:35:00.000-08:00

You know what really makes me mad?

It's not the price of a new car, or quality clothes...

It's not my heating or electric bill...

It's not the price of gasoline (but this does make me sad), or groceries...

It's the price of toilet paper that really pisses me off!

Guests for the Holidays

2008-12-20T09:40:00.000-08:00

A good reason to invite friends over for the holidays

is that it forces you to really clean the house

The only problem is that it doesn't give you enough time to clean yourself

2008-12-10T17:42:00.000-08:00

"Be kinder than necessary, for everyone you meet is fighting some kind of battle."

Thanks Jackie for forwarding me this quote.

I'm embarrassed to say that in my younger days---whenever I encountered a rude person, I made it my business to be just as rude back to them.

I now make a point to be especially kind to rude people as I don't believe that their intent is to be unkind. Maybe they are just having a bad day...and in my own little way I can

make their day better or worse....

Louise June Miller

How to initiate divorce

2008-12-07T04:07:00.000-08:00

If you are in a bad relationship and want out...here are some proven ways to help speed the process of getting a divorce.

Male:
Always drink directly from the milk carton
Female:
Leave milk in the cabinet several days before refrigerating

Male:
Always leave the toilet seat in the up position and never flush. Better yet --- remove the toilet seat.
Female:
Decorate the bathroom in all pink including a fluffy pink toilet seat cover.

Male:
Never fill up the ice cube trays.
Female:
Season the ice with cayenne pepper.

Male:
Do you wife's laundry and use lots of bleach.
Female:
Wash your husband’s white briefs with all your reds.

Male:
Drink a lot
Female:
Drink his beer.

Male:
If you don’t smoke. Start.
Female:
Stop brushing your teeth.

Male:
When not smoking…chew tobacco
Female:
Eat lots of garlic

Male:
Start snoring. If you already snore…snore louder.
Female:
Wear flannel pjs and curlers to bed.

Male:
Invite the dog to bed.
Female:
Hog the sheets.

Male:
Quit mowing the grass.
Female:
Quit paying the bills

Male:
Quit taking out the trash.
Female:
Quit cleaning the house

Male:
Pick your nose
Female:
Bite your nails and then eat them

Male:
Leave the newspaper scattered all over the floor.
Female:
Throw away the sports section.

Anyone who knows me, is aware that I believe in the sanctity of marriage. This list was generated by my husband and myself. He came up with the male perspective, of course. We had a good laugh putting this list together.

Remember in a marriage you need to be full of forgiveness, encouragement and love.

And trying to keep your bad habits to a minimum.

.........

Good Shoes

2008-12-03T17:22:00.000-08:00

Expensive shoes can hurt your feet
as well as cheap shoes,

but they last longer...

Quote On Intent

2008-12-02T04:31:00.000-08:00

"Be careful how you judge others...As Scottish author J.M. Barrie said, 'Never ascribe to an opponent motives meaner than your own...' We tend to judge others based on their behavior, and ourselves based on our intent. In almost all situations, we would do well to recognize the possibility - even probability - of good intent in others...sometimes despite their observable behavior."

-Stephen M.R. Covey in The Speed of Trust (Free Press)

....

WOMEN ONLY!

2008-11-27T05:02:00.000-08:00

Girls...everything we need to know, we learned in Kindergarten....Boys Are Stupid!

I've changed this blog to a "Women Only" site. Unfortunately, I shared another blog (http://www.stonesoupproject.blogspot.com/) with my co-workers. The only problem is that they could see this site in my profiles.

This blog is way too personal and silly for everyone's viewing. HA!

So all boys --- get out! (except for dad)

Intent

2008-11-22T12:59:00.001-08:00

Isn’t it funny...

how we always forgive ourselves for the stupid things we say to other people...

because we know that our intent isn’t to harm anyone’s feelings...

but we always think our offender's intent is to purposely hurt us

You look tired...are you feeling okay? I'm not Tired! and I feel fine! Thanks!

Beauty Tips & Secrets

2008-11-21T14:21:00.000-08:00

Never, and I mean never --- look into a magnifying mirror. For me it’s not so much the wrinkles but the hair

Never wear low rider jeans with a crop top

While driving --- never look into the visor mirror…always use the rear view mirror. . . And always use it while driving in rush hour traffic. Gives you less time to focus.

Only eat a quarter of a cookie at a time. It’s okay to eat the whole cookie --- but not all at once. Just think about all the calories you are saving…and the exercise by walking into the kitchen four times.

Actually forget everything above,,,just be yourself
Let it all hang out,.. hold your head up high… and don’t forget to smile

ALL YOUR DREAMS CAN COME TRUE

Saying "NO"!

2008-11-09T04:11:00.000-08:00

The other day, a CPA I know talked about how we accountants always end up doing all our family’s taxes for free. He said that he does the taxes for all his children, grandchildren and even nieces and nephews. I laughed and said that he obviously hasn’t learn to say the most powerful word in the English language which is "NO".

I explained that I used to do everyone’s taxes --- but now I only do ours. Our personal and business taxes are both fairly complicated so I have to take a week’s vacation just to prepare them.

For years I used to prepare taxes for family, neighbors and even casual acquaintances. Then one year I felt overwhelmed. Not only did I not want to do anyone else’s taxes but also I didn’t want to do ours. I contemplated hiring an outside firm to prepare them. I talked to my husband and he was agreeable but wanted to know why this year I felt differently. I was just tired. I was working 10-12 hours a day, coming home to responsibilities in our own business, taking time off for vacation that was spent doing taxes---not only for us but everyone who asked. We finally narrowed it down to the fact that I didn’t mind doing our taxes but I really resented doing everyone else’s. I felt obligated since I had been helping these people out for years. He made it very simple. He asked me if any of the people I helped ever volunteered their time doing anything for us. I said "no". He then said "don’t feel obligated". I immediately cut everyone off from my services.

When you do things you don’t really want to do or especially when you spend time working for someone that would not reciprocate with their time; then you feel resentful. For me I just remember that the other person probably doesn’t realize what they are asking me to give up---my precious time. So I’m not mad because they are not evolved enough to recognize this fact. People don’t tend to give any value to your time. Sometimes I explain why I’m not doing something and other times I just say "no" without an explanation.
While I was walking down the street the other day my neighbor’s daughter asked if I would do her boyfriends taxes. My first word was "NO". I said it proudly and loudly. I then followed it up with another louder "NO"! And then I laughed. It felt good.

I’ve become an expert at saying "no". I now truly refuse to give up my weekends to attend a Tupperware party…or anything resembling a Tupperware Party. I don’t attend all graduation, birthday, and wedding parties for distant relatives or friends. I send them a funny card with a sizeable check …and sometimes without even an excuse for why I’m not coming.

Don’t get me wrong. Spending time, helping family is the greatest present you can give yourself. Helping an elderly neighbor or working with a charity only brings you good feelings and contentment. Unfortunately, we only have so much time in the day. We tend to spread ourselves too thin and not spend quality time doing what means most to us. In the past, I felt that I was doing so much for other people that I wasn’t being a good spouse, daughter or sister. I want to nurture these relationships and not the relationship with my neighbor’s daughter’s boyfriend. It a matter of prioritizing the relationships that means the most to you.

Helpful tips:

When you say "no" don’t say it with any anger in your voice. There is no reason to be mad.
Give yourself time to say "no" ---never say "yes" immediately. Say instead "let me check my calendar or just let me think about it.
Let people know that they never need invite you to something you abhor such as Tupperware parties. (I haven’t been invited to a Tupperware like party in years.)
Say things like, I really like to help you but my plate is already full.

Giving Your Marriage Attention & Energy

2008-11-08T09:19:00.000-08:00

I hate hearing people say that "Marriage" is work. Marriage is not work, but what it needs to survive is attention and energy. We give other people who are less important than our spouse much more attention than we give the person we love most. We treat everyone at work with respect, the paperboy, the waitress, our parents, and siblings but do we treat our spouse with the same amount of respect?

Instead of getting mad at our boss or co-worker, we save up our anger to release it on the people living with us.

In order to have a happy fulfilling relationship we must change. I listened to Rabbi Shmuley on the radio say that his New Year’s resolution was to make his wife laugh more. I loved this. It made me think. Am I being a good wife, a good friend to my husband? Am I being his supporter, his confidant, and his cheerleader? Am I bringing him down or lifting him up. Do I make him laugh? Unfortunately, I have to admit that I wasn’t being the companion that I needed to be. If you want to be treated well….you have to treat well. You have to respect.

The first thing I did was focus on all the good things about my husband. We as people tend to focus on the negative. We can’t help it….it is how our brain is wired. So I decided that I would think about all the things that made me fall in love with my husband. I make it a point everyday to do this. I decided to keep my negative opinions to a minimum but to "amp" up my encouragement. I’ve been letting my husband know that I truly love and appreciate all that he does for me.

We sometimes get caught up in all the big things and forget to focus on the little things that really matter. Like the fact that my husband makes me a cup of coffee every morning…and brings it to me. In cold weather he starts my car so that it’s warm when I get in. Sometimes he makes a special trip out of his way to pick up my favorite wine.

After I’ve said all that---does it really matter that he leaves his socks in the middle of the floor. Not really. He is not perfect---I’m not perfect.

Since I have started being more aware, appreciative of my husband I’ve noticed that he is more confident. Isn’t it amazing that your spouse is the one person that can really wear on your confidence. He is more relaxed. Why? Because he feels loved. He gets the love from home so he doesn’t feel that he has to get acceptance from other places.

Let’s all make our spouse laugh more!

Looking in the Mirror

2008-11-01T10:27:00.000-07:00

Definition of Mental Health:
"A state of emotional and psychological well-being in which an individual is able to use his or her cognitive and emotional capabilities, function in society and meet ordinary demands of everyday life.

(American Heritage Dictionary)

As a person who struggles daily with depression and stress, I’m dedicated to not only being able to function in society and meet ordinary demands but to have "Good Mental Health"… having extreme feelings of well-being, happiness, satisfaction, creativity, comfort, gratification, joy and bliss---in my everyday life. Unfortunately, for some of us --- this doesn’t come effortlessly but takes a conscious decision every day to live our lives with grace and tranquility.
Louise June Miller

Looking In The Mirror

Many of us think that as we age that looking in the mirror becomes more and more difficult, but is our opinion of our bodies really true or really a lie. Have we ever been happy with our looks at any age? This is a question we should ask ourselves. Personally I can remember being sixteen years old and thinking my thighs were huge. I was very athletic. I was 5’4" tall and weighed a 110 pounds. Of course my thighs were not fat. I would die to have those thighs again. So now at age forty-five it is hard to lose those same feelings. If you think you are fat at 16 how can we expect to feel any different as we age?

I was listening to Oprah talk on her soul series to someone about her weight. Her guest asked Oprah to describe her issues with weight and Oprah replied that she wished that she were a size 10 instead of a size 14. Her guest asked her if she truly felt that her body was too large. Oprah replied "yes… in her opinion that she felt that she was too big". The guest asked, "do you know this to be a truth" that you are too large. Oprah struggled with this question but eventually said that her body had served her well and that she could not say that it was an absolute truth that she was too big. The guest then asked if Oprah didn’t not have these negative feelings towards herself "How would she feel?"….and Oprah said "joyful". She acknowledged that she puts too much time and energy into negative thoughts about herself. If she didn’t have these thoughts that she could give energy to other things. Oprah’s guest stated that it is not the fact that Oprah’s body is too large "it is Oprah’s thought that it is too large that causes her stress".

Oprah’s always talking about "aha moments"; well this was my aha moment. Here is one of the most influential, wealthy, beautiful black woman in the world talking about her negative self image. So many women would love to look like Oprah. She looks like she has everything, the job, the best friend, the boyfriend, the money….and the looks. How can she possibility think she is fat when I think we all think she is absolutely beautiful? Well she can think she is fat because we all thing negative thoughts about ourselves that are not necessarily true. Unfortunately, most of our brains are hardwired to breed negativity. Look at all the models that have self image problems---these are models! They wouldn’t be models if they didn’t look good. It made me realized that I needed to start appreciating my body now, today. Not look back on my life and say I looked good when I was sixteen, I looked good when I was twenty, thirty, but never acknowledging that I look good now.

When I let go of my negative thoughts about myself, I find that I stand taller and I’m more confident. People responded to me differently. I feel that people can sense my inner beauty radiating outward.

If we can just let go of our own made-up negative stories about ourselves and instead focus on living a life full of fun and adventure we would be so much happier. We don’t believe Oprah’s story that she is too big so let’s stop believing in our own negative stories about ourselves. We use up too much of our energy focusing on the negative and not the positive aspects of our lives. I will never look like I did when I was sixteen years old, but I also will never look like I do now at the age of forty-five. The fact of life is that we age. Let’s not forgive ourselves for aging let’s embrace ourselves for aging. Appreciate that we have bodies that serve us well…and that we are all beautiful for being unique and different.